I just noted that I have not blogged for a week plus. That is considered long for someone who has a lot cynic to share. But, the gigantum magnitude of workload imposed on me has been beyond the definition of plenty. OK, I'm exaggerating, plenty is overstated. It's just a lot. A L-O-T.
Just when I thought this week would be a pleasant week since my big boss is off for 2days, boy, was I darn wrong. He was literally checking his mail via his Blackberry (THE person who created this piece of cumbersome technology in my humble opinion ought to be shot dead right through the forehead AND, some virus writer should implant a self destruction virus into each Blackberry so it no longer exist as an object on this surface on Earth) with questions about some fuckers who has nothing better to do but to 'arrow' his issues upon my team / have a point to prove thus resulting again on my team being 'arrowed' at or assigning workload or checking on my progress of deliverable which are hotly due next week.
Sigh.
While I was frantically trying my best to complete my real deliverable for the week, here I was, having to diarize, reply and explain incoming mails after mails particularly, from him (there were even mails which I received that made me go, "Now, what the hell is actually?" And I had to walk thru' and squeeze every single information and history of the issue as much as my little fingers could garner to come to some solution).
Sigh.
Just when I thought this week would be a pleasant week since my big boss is off for 2days, boy, was I darn wrong. He was literally checking his mail via his Blackberry (THE person who created this piece of cumbersome technology in my humble opinion ought to be shot dead right through the forehead AND, some virus writer should implant a self destruction virus into each Blackberry so it no longer exist as an object on this surface on Earth) with questions about some fuckers who has nothing better to do but to 'arrow' his issues upon my team / have a point to prove thus resulting again on my team being 'arrowed' at or assigning workload or checking on my progress of deliverable which are hotly due next week.
Sigh.
While I was frantically trying my best to complete my real deliverable for the week, here I was, having to diarize, reply and explain incoming mails after mails particularly, from him (there were even mails which I received that made me go, "Now, what the hell is actually?" And I had to walk thru' and squeeze every single information and history of the issue as much as my little fingers could garner to come to some solution).
Sigh.
And there was even an occasion, where I totally did not have an answer to the solution. Nor has anyone. I just left for home, praying to God, that the solution through the eventual turn of event and ways of life would revealed itself naturally.
I just let go for once in my capacity as someone who has always something for a solution. The issue was not merely about work but about my role as a human being with emotions and feelings against a must-deliver submission. It was challenging my principal as a human and my principal as a supervisor, colleague, staff and friend. All, melted into one. It was such a dead end.
That was my share on work. People who doesn't work in my capacity would never ever understand the trauma I go through.
Sigh.
But as I was telling Adrian, if you are not going to climb the mountain, how do you expect to reach the top? Of course, it is the matter of time and that, depends on how fast aka fit I am to get there.
So, despite it all, I have decided that I will stick to it until I am there. Then I will jump to another mountain to hike. And that would be an easier mountain for sure.
Within berserk workload lifestyle, the consolation is
1. I don't need to bring my work back for the weekend
2. I am confirmed taking off in late April to Switzerland and Italy.
Yahoo.
So, with the remaining spare time, here I am charting my route, travel arrangement and accommodation for that 10-12 long days in Europe. Indeed, I am looking forward.
Anyway, it is also time I take a break by then because with this amount of being chased and tension it is creating day by day, the accumulated stress has to be given a break to regain some sanity.
Many things has also happened within this week.
For one, we have decided as a small group we will register for a dancing class soon. Yeah, dancing class. Beat that. I never thought I would seriously indulge in this form of entertainment (or sport, call it however you want) but indeed we are about to get our feet moving to the beat. Haha. For the heck of fun. For the heck of learning. So, yes, another stuff to keep the busy bee even busier over weekends :-)
On matters of life, Boon has just got news about his baby. According to the doctors, she has been confirm an abnormal baby and would have extremely thin chance of survival when she is due in 4 months time.
I feel for Boon and wifey as this is a child who is supposedly be joining us Earthlings soon and yet, news has it now that she would not be making it. It's sad. It's very, very sad.
I pray things has its ways in soothing it kindly for Boon and wife throughout this emotionally challenging phrase.
Sometimes, it makes me wonder (tho I have already the answer) again, why does such sad things happen to good people? Why is it that it doesn't happen to people like Josephine or Maggie or Sara or Chris or Patrick or whoever else evil which is not on the top of my mind now (this, I don't have an answer). Why?
Is it that the every month vegetarian vow they take, or the once in the blue moon feeling-guilty-so-I-am-doing-charity work leveraging out on their bad shits really taking effect? Or that, their hypocrisy is actually a sheep in wolf skin (note the animal swap please) that is O-K to be bad? Or is it that, by the virtue of insincerity and fake-ism that they are so blessed with life? Or is it that, the injustice of their actions to the many people around them is actually doing justice to us people who actually IS the bad one?
I wonder.
So, to some people (who refuse to dwell deeper than this) they would often lament that Life-Is-Not-Fair afterall.
I digress. Because, I choose to believe life is fair. Because there is such thing call Karma and Retribution.
At such occasion, I wonder to myself, when would Karma hit on people like them? Like when?
I don't think turning vegetarian every month during some holy day or going to the temple to seek good luck and then perform repayment rites ARE the thing to get away with murder (so to speak). I REALLY don't think that is life's methodology of working out that equilibrium.
But on the hind side, we don't know what is really happening internally - emotionally, mentally, physically to these people. I mean, maybe something is eating them up after all. We don't know.
So let's give doubt the benefit. As always.
Besides these, Janie called to talk about the Old man again. As a friend, I will not and have not push her aside over this repeated matter but I honestly feel she should just make a decision and move on. Over dwelling to keep the relationship is just wasting her time, not his. And Janie who has gone through so much, should have the confidence about herself to pull this through. She sometimes doesn't believe enough in herself.
I mean, what use is there to keep going thru the same issue over and over again? It is the SAME thing everytime they have a conflict. Same fundamental issue. Today, it does not make sense even if he gives her money to spend. The money can not be one of the reason to stay on this fragile relationship.
As I was arranging my dishes today, this strucked me, "The Old man did not really extend his neck on anything for her after all. To begin with, while he was with her and vowing his faithfulness and commitment to the wrongful relationship, he brought his entire family to Australia for a better life. And he left her here high and dry with PROMISE to be with her one day."
What the fuck was that?
2 years later, he is still there, this time with new excuses for not being with her and for not divorcing his wife.
There.
Fucking utter rubbish.
See my point people? See why I said to Janie on the phone that going with him per se is a bad idea?
And the money. At one point, we friends think, by getting him to pay 'some' form of pocket money would lure him into getting his fat old ass off from Down Under and be with her as the monthly dough would give a pinch to phis ocket to realise that someone is indeed waiting and to cut some losses, it makes more sense to just leave his wife and be with her. And with that too, he is serious about 'taking care' of her as he has been aptly putting it every other day. Yada yada yada.
OK, now people will start wondering what a friend I am, encouraging a man to leave his lawfully wedded wife for my friend. Like how lopsided I am and bias.
Let's put this straight, he promised her he would leave his wife ONE DAY for her. He promised her eternal love. He promised her, she will be forever with him or vice versa (you know la, Keling, when they start cakap konek, this is what comes out of it) and everything else along this love mundane lines.
And so, to me, it's simple fact, based on what he has said, he would leave her one day as he promised. And with that, I don't believe a promise has to take eternally like some 2-3 years already. Or was it more?
But after all the drama, dancing around coconut trees, sari covering the faces, group dancing, singing, chasing around the garden, nothing has happened.
Only, Janie heart is always broken over and over again (which I also blame her for not believing enough of herself and her friends) by this man.
So in this context, as a friend, should I be right to advice to leave the fucker and start life afresh (including looking out for a REAL life partner) and that keeping the relationship is a totally bad idea?
I don't think my sense of logic is that bad even tho I may have missed a point or two.
But as I have said to Janie, whatever her decision is, to stay or walk out, as a friend, she has my support and blessings. Because by end of the day, this is her life, she choice, her journey.
Well, so much for this and that. It's been a long rant but these are so much of the issues in my mind at the moment.
I hope for everyone's wellness. And I hope to be having a good week ahead despite a tight deliverable week at work. Be well people. *Muakz*
Yahoo.
So, with the remaining spare time, here I am charting my route, travel arrangement and accommodation for that 10-12 long days in Europe. Indeed, I am looking forward.
Anyway, it is also time I take a break by then because with this amount of being chased and tension it is creating day by day, the accumulated stress has to be given a break to regain some sanity.
Many things has also happened within this week.
For one, we have decided as a small group we will register for a dancing class soon. Yeah, dancing class. Beat that. I never thought I would seriously indulge in this form of entertainment (or sport, call it however you want) but indeed we are about to get our feet moving to the beat. Haha. For the heck of fun. For the heck of learning. So, yes, another stuff to keep the busy bee even busier over weekends :-)
On matters of life, Boon has just got news about his baby. According to the doctors, she has been confirm an abnormal baby and would have extremely thin chance of survival when she is due in 4 months time.
I feel for Boon and wifey as this is a child who is supposedly be joining us Earthlings soon and yet, news has it now that she would not be making it. It's sad. It's very, very sad.
I pray things has its ways in soothing it kindly for Boon and wife throughout this emotionally challenging phrase.
Sometimes, it makes me wonder (tho I have already the answer) again, why does such sad things happen to good people? Why is it that it doesn't happen to people like Josephine or Maggie or Sara or Chris or Patrick or whoever else evil which is not on the top of my mind now (this, I don't have an answer). Why?
Is it that the every month vegetarian vow they take, or the once in the blue moon feeling-guilty-so-I-am-doing-charity work leveraging out on their bad shits really taking effect? Or that, their hypocrisy is actually a sheep in wolf skin (note the animal swap please) that is O-K to be bad? Or is it that, by the virtue of insincerity and fake-ism that they are so blessed with life? Or is it that, the injustice of their actions to the many people around them is actually doing justice to us people who actually IS the bad one?
I wonder.
So, to some people (who refuse to dwell deeper than this) they would often lament that Life-Is-Not-Fair afterall.
I digress. Because, I choose to believe life is fair. Because there is such thing call Karma and Retribution.
At such occasion, I wonder to myself, when would Karma hit on people like them? Like when?
I don't think turning vegetarian every month during some holy day or going to the temple to seek good luck and then perform repayment rites ARE the thing to get away with murder (so to speak). I REALLY don't think that is life's methodology of working out that equilibrium.
But on the hind side, we don't know what is really happening internally - emotionally, mentally, physically to these people. I mean, maybe something is eating them up after all. We don't know.
So let's give doubt the benefit. As always.
Besides these, Janie called to talk about the Old man again. As a friend, I will not and have not push her aside over this repeated matter but I honestly feel she should just make a decision and move on. Over dwelling to keep the relationship is just wasting her time, not his. And Janie who has gone through so much, should have the confidence about herself to pull this through. She sometimes doesn't believe enough in herself.
I mean, what use is there to keep going thru the same issue over and over again? It is the SAME thing everytime they have a conflict. Same fundamental issue. Today, it does not make sense even if he gives her money to spend. The money can not be one of the reason to stay on this fragile relationship.
As I was arranging my dishes today, this strucked me, "The Old man did not really extend his neck on anything for her after all. To begin with, while he was with her and vowing his faithfulness and commitment to the wrongful relationship, he brought his entire family to Australia for a better life. And he left her here high and dry with PROMISE to be with her one day."
What the fuck was that?
2 years later, he is still there, this time with new excuses for not being with her and for not divorcing his wife.
There.
Fucking utter rubbish.
See my point people? See why I said to Janie on the phone that going with him per se is a bad idea?
And the money. At one point, we friends think, by getting him to pay 'some' form of pocket money would lure him into getting his fat old ass off from Down Under and be with her as the monthly dough would give a pinch to phis ocket to realise that someone is indeed waiting and to cut some losses, it makes more sense to just leave his wife and be with her. And with that too, he is serious about 'taking care' of her as he has been aptly putting it every other day. Yada yada yada.
OK, now people will start wondering what a friend I am, encouraging a man to leave his lawfully wedded wife for my friend. Like how lopsided I am and bias.
Let's put this straight, he promised her he would leave his wife ONE DAY for her. He promised her eternal love. He promised her, she will be forever with him or vice versa (you know la, Keling, when they start cakap konek, this is what comes out of it) and everything else along this love mundane lines.
And so, to me, it's simple fact, based on what he has said, he would leave her one day as he promised. And with that, I don't believe a promise has to take eternally like some 2-3 years already. Or was it more?
But after all the drama, dancing around coconut trees, sari covering the faces, group dancing, singing, chasing around the garden, nothing has happened.
Only, Janie heart is always broken over and over again (which I also blame her for not believing enough of herself and her friends) by this man.
So in this context, as a friend, should I be right to advice to leave the fucker and start life afresh (including looking out for a REAL life partner) and that keeping the relationship is a totally bad idea?
I don't think my sense of logic is that bad even tho I may have missed a point or two.
But as I have said to Janie, whatever her decision is, to stay or walk out, as a friend, she has my support and blessings. Because by end of the day, this is her life, she choice, her journey.
Well, so much for this and that. It's been a long rant but these are so much of the issues in my mind at the moment.
I hope for everyone's wellness. And I hope to be having a good week ahead despite a tight deliverable week at work. Be well people. *Muakz*
